Week 5 NCAA Free Football Picks (9/27/2008): Introducing the Backwoods Southern Lawyer, AKA SEC Genius!!!
Flash and Runny have reached out to another guest writer. Mr. SEC lawyer as we named him is picking at an 80% clip for SEC games. He told us not to bet the Miss St./Auburn game, he told us not to bet the Georgia/South Carolina game and he has been dead spot on all year. Well Mr. SEC Lawyer has agreed to guest post for us and he will now be referred to as BSL or Backwoods Southern Lawyer. BSL loves NCAA football, specifically SEC football. He lives and breathes SEC football and we have found him to have the best pick ideas related to SEC football in the country. We are privileged to serve as his voice.
I believe it was Reba McEntire who sang “Don’t trust your soul to no backwoods Southern Lawyer”, but my faithful clients can trust their dollars and be well rewarded. The verdict is in — yours truly is a blistering 80% on SEC games in September and back with more winners this week. Have you or your pocketbook been injured by college football misfires? Well, strap on your neckbrace, stick with me and we’ll laugh all the way to the bank.
Be forewarned. Runny and Flash have crunched the numbers eight ways to Sunday; they work a reliable system and grind out impressive results year after year. I’m more of a “feel” guy. I get my picks from having been born and raised 3 doors down from the gates of one of the premier SEC campuses (literally being able to hear the roar of the crowd from my room); from worshiping names like Herschel Walker and Bo Jackson and Archie Manning; from tailgates that start on Thursday; from being one fo the first ones in and the last to leave the stadium; and most importantly, from living and breathing SEC football for well nigh 30 years now. The law may be my profession, but SEC football is my passion, and I’m just here to share the love and — above all — I’m here to make a dollar and a cent in this business. So, without further ado, let’s get to the picks….
Call it the weekend of the home favorite in the SEC. With the exception of Ole Miss, that’s who I’m going with:
TAKE OLE MISS +22 AT FLORIDA. Houston Nutt knows how to get up for big games (i.e., Hogs upsetting LSU in last year’s regular season finale). Gators have been playing the offense playcalling close to the vest. Expect another vanilla showing and a 17-point Florida victory.
TAKE LSU -24 VS. MISS. ST. Auburn beats MSU by 1 point. The next week, LSU beats Auburn by 5 points. So, what does Vegas say — opening line is LSU over Miss St. by 24 points. They are on to something. For one reason or another, LSU owns Miss. St.– like 15 of the last 16 owns. And, lately, it hasn’t been close. The win over Auburn has got LSU primed for a big game, not a let down. If LSU gets up early, this one will not be within 5 touchdowns.
TAKE AUBURN -6.5 VS. TENNESSEE. The wheels are falling off Fulmer’s bus, which makes me question this pick because last year, just when you thought he was a beaten man, Tennessee went on a run and made it to the SEC Championship Game. HOWEVER, Tennessee just doesn’t have the dogs for this hunt. Auburn rolls in a low-scoring affair.
TAKE GEORGIA -6.5 VS. BAMA. Georgia was ranked number one to start the season for a reason. They are loaded and are going to make this a statement game at home. John Parker Wilson (or whatever his name is) is an average quarterback and will show it this weekend.
Enjoy the picks. I will be back next week for more action.
First things first. Our performance has been less than stellar….RPJ is now 9-11-1. Flash is 3-1 and Runny is 6-6. We clearly want to make money and we are not pleased and will not make any excuses like a terrible Kansas line for a push and two half point losses already on the season…..but who is checking. We also changed our blog from RPJ Syndicate to RPJ $yndicate to invoke the gods of the almighty dollar.
Thanks for all of the advice and for your support or knocks. Our models take into account everything you can think of under the sun and then some so we feel confident we will turn this around in no time.
Our rules…We bet every game we put on here and at the lines we post them. Lately we know we have shared the pain but some serious cash is right around the corner. We are going to throw out a lot of games this week, including our first great debate game. RPJ $yndicate picks are picks that pass 100% of our combined models, Runny picks are picks that pass his models but do not pass Flash’s models and Flash’s picks are picks that pass Flash’s models but do not pass Runny’s models. Simple enough. On with the picks….after the obligatory arse shots. We had a request for more Keyra videos and who are we to deny you of that pleasure. Enjoy Mr. SEC lawyer friend….
And one nice pic of Keyra can not hurt either….
And just to continue with the theme here….Miss Angelina Jolie. We wish the cameraman focused a little more to the left and it was raining outside but hey we do not live in a perfect world.
Last but not least…Anybody have a problem with Playboy? We do not think so.
Yes we will still make picks this week and here we go….
RPJ $yndicate Picks
Temple at Penn State (-28.5) – Penn State helped us out last week for one of our wins. Not sure it was more about Penn State or more about how terrible Syracuse was but a win is a win and for us right now that is all that matters. Penn State is going for its 26th straight win against The Owls. The Nittany Lions (3-0) are among the nation’s top 25 in both passing (273.0 ypg) and rushing (263.0 ypg), resulting in the country’s eighth-ranked total offense and fourth-highest scoring team. Temple is coming off two crushing defeats, one in OT to UCONN and the other on a hail mary pass to Buffalo as time expired. Here are the ATS numbers:
Owls are 5-0 ATS in their last 5 games overall.
Owls are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games following a ATS win.
Owls are 8-2 ATS in their last 10 games on grass.
Owls are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games in September.
Owls are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 road games.
Owls are 5-2 ATS in their last 7 games following a S.U. loss.
Owls are 16-7 ATS in their last 23 road games vs. a team with a winning home record.
Owls are 0-4 ATS in their last 4 vs. Big Ten.
NittanyLions are 4-0 ATS vs. a team with a losing record.
Nittany Lions are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 non-conference games.
Nittany Lions are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 vs. MAC.
Nittany Lions are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games overall.
NittanyLions are 19-7 ATS in their last 26 home games vs. a team with a losing road record.
Favorite is 5-1 ATS in their last 6 meetings.
Owls are 1-5 ATS in their last 6 meetings.
Temple has some impressive ATS numbers, as does Penn State, but what it really comes down to is Temple can not compete in Penn State or against Penn State. No way, no how. The last two years or so when Temple was putting up these impressive ATS numbers they were also losing to Penn State at home 31-0 in 2007 and in Happy Valley 47-0 in 2006. Temple will not cover, NO WAY, NO HOW!!! Take Penn State to dominate this game and win by 30 plus points.
LSU at Auburn (+2.5) – This is definitely the game of the week and ESPN Game Day canceled their Arizona State show to move to Auburn after The Sun Devil’s choke job last week. Auburn is coming off a ridiculous game that they won 3-2. Words can not describe how awful and terrible the offenses were. If Auburn can not score against Mississippi State then how the hell are they going to score against LSU. LSU has had hurricane on the mind and really has needed to get games in to break in their QBs and offense. Auburn has a top rated defense as well so if LSU is not ready to play on offense this score could be lower than the 3-2 we saw last week. The ATS numbers:
Under is 4-0 in Tigers last 4 games in September.
Under is 4-0 in Tigers last 4 games on grass.
Under is 5-0 in Tigers last 5 home games.
Under is 5-0 in Tigers last 5 games overall.
Under is 4-1 in Tigers last 5 games in September.
Under is 8-2 in Tigers last 10 conference games.
Under is 6-2 in Tigers last 8 games following a S.U. win.
Under is 6-2 in Tigers last 8 vs. a team with a winning record.
Under is 15-6 in Tigers last 21 home games vs. a team with a winning road record.
Under is 4-0 in the last 4 meetings in Auburn.
Under is 7-1 in the last 8 meetings.
Yep. you guessed it. We are mixing it up this week and throwing in our pick as an over/under pick. Right now the O/U line is at 37.5 and we love that number. These offenses are not ready to play but the defenses are. Remember two years ago…LSU at Auburn….final score was 7-3 in favor of Auburn. Take the under (37.5) in this game.
Wake Forest at Florida State (-5) – This game is pretty simple to see for us. Wake Forest has actually tested itself this season with a road win at Baylor and a home win versus Ole Miss. Baylor is impressive in the fact that Wake traveled and won in the state of Texas for the first time ever and Ole Miss is impressive simply because it is an SEC school. We know absolutely nothing about Florida State because they chose to beat up on 1-AA schools. And yes we refuse to call them anything but 1-AA schools. The ATS numbers:
Demon Deacons are 7-0 ATS in their last 7 games following a ATS loss.
Demon Deacons are 6-1 ATS in their last 7 games following a S.U. win.
Demon Deacons are 9-2 ATS in their last 11 road games vs. a team with a winning home record.
Demon Deacons are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 conference games.
Demon Deacons are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 road games.
Demon Deacons are 8-2 ATS in their last 10 games overall.
Demon Deacons are 13-4 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Demon Deacons are 6-2 ATS in their last 8 games on grass.
Seminoles are 2-5-1 ATS in their last 8 games on grass.
Seminoles are 1-4-1 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Seminoles are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games following a S.U. win.
Seminoles are 0-5 ATS in their last 5 games following a SU win of more than 20 points.
Seminoles are 0-5 ATS in their last 5 games after scoring more than 40 points in their previous game.
Demon Deacons are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 meetings.
Underdog is 4-0 ATS in their last 4 meetings.
We think this game favors Wake. They are tougher and more tested. Wake also has a two game winning streak going against the Seminoles and that shows us that Wake knows how to win in Tallahassee. We think this game will be close and physical and do expect Wake to win in the end. The fact that we get 5 points makes it all the better. Take Wake and the points.
Notre Dame at Michigan State (-9) – Our favorite battering ram. Of course Notre Dame kicked us in the arse last week. Damn early turnovers killed Michigan. Well Charlie Weis put all his eggs in the Michigan basket. He talked about beating them all off season and observers say he had more emotion and was more prepared for last week’s Michigan game than any game he has ever coached. You know what that means….let down city. Charlie also got knocked on his fat ass and hurt his knee. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!! Look at the fat walrus fall….
Michigan State is not a team you can overlook. They are physical, run well and have a great coach. We know Notre Dame shaves their Kuntz and if you do not believe us then click this sentence. The ATS numbers:
Fighting Irish are 2-6 ATS in their last 8 games in September.
Fighting Irish are 3-10 ATS in their last 13 games after accumulating less than 275 total yards in their previous game.
Fighting Irish are 2-10 ATS in their last 12 games after accumulating less than 170 yards passing in their previous game.
Spartans are 4-0 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Spartans are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games following a S.U. win.
Spartans are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games following a ATS loss.
Spartans are 8-3 ATS in their last 11 vs. INDEP.
Fighting Irish are 3-8 ATS in their last 11 meetings.
We think this is a heavily overrated Irish team. Barely beating SDSU and stomping a depleted, young Michigan team in the infancy of a completely new offense does not impress us at all. MSU is the much better team. They roll at home. Take MSU -9.
Runny Versus Flash – The Great Debate Game
Georgia (-7) at Arizona State – Well it was bound to happen and it only took until Week 4 but Runny and Flash are split on this game. We are not going to bet this game because we are split on what is going to happen. However, we know our readers want to know what is going to happen in this game because it is the game of the week. This game is important on many levels and especially for the Pac-10 versus SEC feud. The Pac-10 laid an egg last week, especially against Mountain West foes and the Mt. West is far removed from SEC competition. Tennessee went to UCLA and got pummeled by a bad UCLA team that went to BYU and lost 59-0. Yup 59-0. Georgia was the pre-season #1 and many predicted them to be national champion. If Georgia is to live up to the hype, they have to go on the road to Arizona State and win convincingly. Amazing tidbit….this is the first time Georgia has travelled west of the Mississippi River since……….1960. 1960!!!!!! Are you freakin kidding us?!?! On top of that, this is the furthest The Dawgs have traveled in the regular season since…..1967. What the F? The SEC is by far the worst traveling conference in all of college football. It can not even be argued. Here are the ATS numbers before we get into our debate:
Bulldogs are 5-0 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Bulldogs are 4-0-1 ATS in their last 5 games on grass.
Bulldogs are 5-0-1 ATS in their last 6 games following a S.U. win.
Bulldogs are 5-0-1 ATS in their last 6 games overall.
Bulldogs are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 non-conference games.
Bulldogs are 5-1-1 ATS in their last 7 games after allowing less than 100 yards rushing in their previous game.
Bulldogs are 4-1-1 ATS in their last 6 games in September.
Bulldogs are 4-1-1 ATS in their last 6 games after allowing less than 20 points in their previous game.
Bulldogs are 2-5 ATS in their last 7 games after accumulating less than 275 total yards in their previous game.
Bulldogs are 3-8 ATS in their last 11 games after accumulating less than 170 yards passing in their previous game.
Bulldogs are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games after scoring less than 20 points in their previous game.
Sun Devils are 14-5 ATS in their last 19 games in September.
Sun Devils are 2-5 ATS in their last 7 home games vs. a team with a winning road record.
Sun Devils are 1-4 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Sun Devils are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 home games.
Sun Devils are 1-5 ATS in their last 6 games on grass.
Sun Devils are 1-6 ATS in their last 7 games overall.
Sun Devils are 0-4 ATS in their last 4 games following a ATS loss.
Flash Flash saysthat Georgia has a lot to prove and is not coming off of a look ahead game even though they did not play well against South Carolina. Arizona State played the look ahead game and flat out lost and that will be tough to stomach. Arizona State has one big flaw and that is they struggle against physical teams. USC destroyed them last year and literally bloodied Rudy Carpenter. We remember the blood.
Texas beat Arizona State bad and even Arizona, which is not known for much but is well coached on defense almost beat them before losing 20-17. Last week to UNLV, Arizona State ran for 3.6 yards per carry, lost the turnover battle, lost the time of possession battle, lost the 3rd down conversion and 4th down conversion battle and blew a ten point 4th quarter lead. What does that translate into?…..Not being tough enough. I think the ATS numbers speak for themselves also. You will have to wait and see what Runny thinks but I think every sign but one points to Georgia. Georgia does not know how to travel and the SEC does not travel well. That scares the hell out of me. However, in this case, ASU fields a bunch of pussies and Georgia should roll through them in a big statement game. Georgia wins and covers!!!! Side bar….When asked about dropping out of the top 25, Dennis Erickson responded “I don’t know if we should have been in there to start with.” Way to inspire confidence in your team coach.
Runny SaysGeorgia is the most overrated team in the Top 25. Yeap – THE most overrated. I don’t buy the hype at all. No doubt they have studs on both sides of the ball. However, their O-Line is ATROCIOUS. No way they can win the SEC with that line. No way. And, there is no way they travel 1,000 miles to Zona and dominate a stout D. As we noted above, this is the first time they have traveled West of the Mississippi since 1960 and the furthest they traveled since 1967. This cannot be overstated. As also noted, SEC teams do not travel out of state very well. This also cannot be overstated. Why is that?
The reason, I feel, is that SEC schools do not travel well because they purposely don’t do it. They are not used to it, so when a big game comes a good distance from home, they fold. Pretty much every SEC team loads up on cupcake schools at home like SouthEastCentralWestCrenshaw Louisiana State and think that establishes college football supremacy. I don’t buy it, and neither will ASU. Despite what they are saying in Athens, Geogia is looking past this game. They are smack dab in the middle of a tough conference schedule. Take that and the fact that they have to travel 1,000 miles means Georgia is in trouble.
(SIDE NOTE: As you can imagine, in our travels to various sporting events around this great country of ours we often run into complete degenerates that often have the same interests we do: gambling and handicapping. Some of our readers know our friend, Maury the Wig, who graces our presence during NCAA hoops season. Well, at the USC-OSU game last weekend, we had the pleasure of meeting a fellow by the name of Magic Rat. Imagine being at the biggest regular season college game of the past 10 years and meeting a guy in SoCal wearing cut-off jean shorts, drinking piss warm PBR’s and bitching about teams that were not OSU or USC. Rat was by himself, bitching about the SEC and we found him to be a pure genius. He is a hater and just seemed bash the popular team at the moment. Anyway, we immediately extended the invite to contribute to our blog. He accepted, but we haven’t heard from him since. Hopefully he will grace us with his presence. Stay tuned…we have no idea if he will remember us).
Granted, ASU sucked it something awful last week against UNLV. However, I think it was a look past game. They knew who was coming this week and they got ahead of themselves. Coach Erickson is a good coach. He knows how to motivate. He will turn it around. They may not win, but they can cover 7 points. I’m riding Rudy Carpenter and the Sun Devils and taking the 7 points.
Flash Flash Picks (3-1 on the season) and the rule of 28
Seems like all my picks have 28 point spreads. Here goes:
Wyoming at BYU (-28) – BYU is coming of a total decimation of UCLA in very impressive fashion and continuing with the nation’s longest winning streak. BYU has the toughness and wants to make it into the BCS title picture. Some points to think about…Last week, the Cougars rolled up 521 total yards even though no individual player had more than 110 yards from scrimmage. The Cougars forced four turnovers and allowed nine rushing yards on 16 carries in handing UCLA its first shutout loss since 2001. Do not doubt this team for a second. 28 points does not scare me. BYU wins and covers convincingly!!!
Rice at Texas (-28) – Good things typically happen for Texas when it meets Rice. The Longhorns, who have won nine straight games over the Owls, are 37-1 against them since 1966 to improve to 68-21-1 in the all-time series, which dates to 1914. The favorite is 4-1 ATS in their last 5 meetings and Rice Owls are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 meetings. Texas wins and covers easily!!!
Runny Pelvis (6-6 on the season)
VaTech at UNC (-3) – UNC shocked me last week with their dominating win over Rutgers in Jersey. Pretty damn impressive. Butch Davis has completely turned that program around. He has done an excellent job of recruiting and it is starting to show. Props to him and that team. However, the Hokies have a great coach, too, and a very established program. Frank Beamer knows how to run a team. Despite the fact that they have looked bad this year and lost their opener to East Carolina, I think they cover in this one. I love the points. Some facts: Tech is 10-1 ATS on the road against opponents they beat the year before, Tech is 12-2 in their lined road openers and UNC is 2-8 as Favorites of 6 points or less. VaTech covers and wins outright.
Miss St. at GaTech (-7.5) – Miss St scrapped last week against Auburn. Impressive? Not to me. Their schedule has been a joke: the lost to LaTech and beat SE LA. That’s right-SE LA!!!! Tech, on the other hand played J’Ville St, BC and VaTech. Much more impressive to me. Paul Johnson is a great coach and within two years, he will have GaTech competing for a BCS title. They aren’t there yet, but I think they are the much better team here. Also, Miss St is 1-6 ATS in their games immediately following Auburn. That says to me that they blow their loads against Auburn. Bad timing this week. I’m taking GaTech -7.5.
Iowa at Pitt (+1) – This line says a lot about how Pitt’s season is going. With all the pre-season hype and the studs they have on this team, no way Pitt should be an underdog in this game. However, after an opening loss to Bowling Green and not destroying Buffalo, Pitt finds themselves sucking it. They haven’t covered all year, and they won’t this week. Iowa has a solid D (allowing a Nation’s best only 2.7 points per game) and they beat their bitter rival last week. We like them here, too. Facts: Pitt is 1-6 ATS at home against a team .600 or better under Dave Wannstadt. Enough said for me. Take Iowa -1.
Central Michigan at Purdue (O/U: 64.5) – You readers know that we love us some Dan LaFevour. He is the man!! He knows how to run wild and throw-up some points. However, so does Curtis Painter and Purdue. I love he MAC and I researched this game more than any other this week. Honestly, I cannot figure out who will cover (at posting time, Purdue is giving 3). So, I’m not picking a team. I’m taking the game. Both teams can throw-up massive amounts of point. I love the over in this. Take the OVER 64.5.
Troy at Ohio State (-20.5) – OSU is fresh off the drubbing they received at the hands of SC last weekend. They were completely over matched and dejected by halftime. Now they come home with their tails between their legs and looking to salvage their program and self-respect. Beanie Wells is out, and there has been no decision on who will start at QB. If Tressel is smart, he will go with Pryor for the rest of the season. We watched him in person last week and think he is every bit as good as advertised. He needs to play. However, I think Tressel is still going to play him in spots. I think this is a mistake. This strategy barely beat Ohio. Troy is a MUCH better team than that. They play good D and they smell blood. Facts: Troy is 9-2 in their last 11 road games and OSU is 0-5 at home against non-conference opponents who are coming of a straight-up win. I think OSU wins, but Troy can keep it within 20.5.
Bama at Ark (+8.5) – HUGE SEC battle!! I can’t wait to watch this game. Both coaches left the NFL under high scrutiny. Both have excellent NCAA coaching histories. Bama is stacked and had, in my opinion, the best recruiting class in the country. Julio Jones is a future NFL star and an immediate difference make. Ark does not have that type of player, but they can still play. Both teams will be geeked for this game. What will give? I say Ark covers. Facts: The Dog in this series is 8-3 ATS in their last 11 match-ups, and Ark is 7-1 as underdogs off a non-conference game vs. an opponent off double digit straight-up win. Due to hurricane Ike, Ark is rested and this is the game they have had circled all year. I think they get a huge emotional edge at home. I’m taking the points and riding Ark +8.5.
Ball State at Indiana (-3) – I will be heading to this game and tailgating like a madman. This is a HUGE rivalry for the great state of Indiana. Both teams will be fired-up. I can’t wait!! Should be shootout, but I think Ball State covers. Facts: IU is 6-1-1 against the MAC and 6-1 at home against an opponent off of back-to-back straight-up ATS wins. This favors IU immensely and give that they are in the Big 10, they should blow Ball State out. However, they have had some turmoil this season (Middleton suspension) and they have not looked that great. Balls State is hot, and I can guarantee you that have had this game circled on their calendars since they were pummeled by Rutgers in last year’s final game. Nate Davis is a stud who leaves it all on the field every game. I’m taking Ball State +3.
Florida at TENN (+7.5) – THE #2 game of the week. Another HUGE SEC match-up. These teams hate each other and it is typically a good game. The ATS numbers scream take Tenn: Tenn is 3-1 ATS in their last 4 match-ups and Fla is 2-6 in their last 8 September games. However, the key to me to this game is that Florida is coming off the bye. This is huge. They have had two weeks to prepare for this game. They will be ready. Remember, this is the same Tenn team that lost to a terrible UCLA that was crushed by BYU last week. Tenn is overrated. This spread is high because Vegas knows Tenn is bad. With the ATS numbers, the spread should not be this high. I’m taking Fla -7.5.
Enjoy the picks and feel free to make comments, tell us we suck and cost you your house or tell us what hot chicks you want to see of feel free to send us an email at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Flash and Runny
P.S no idea why this darn blog bolded everything but this is not a beauty contest. Also, we just saw Jeff Tedford and he was eating a turd sandwich.
The Herd came back to earth a little bit this week. For Wheel of Genius picks he was 1-2-1 and his throw in Penn State pick hit. On the season The Herd is now 10-4-1, which is still pretty darn good. The Herd just said he was 11-4-2 and we have no idea where that came from. This is why we watch him and his picks because he tends to inflate at times.
He is also 2-0 on his upset special picks with the first win coming Alabama over Clemson and last night with Colorado beating West Virginia.
Here are his picks for Week 4:
LSU (-2) at Auburn – He is picking the upset here and says Auburn will win 17-14. Tuberville is money in big games and has won 6 straight at home versus Top 10 teams and 9 of 12 overall. The Herd does not like unsettled QB situations and that is a strike against both schools and when it hits both schools you go with the home team.
Notre Dame at Michigan State (-9) – He picked this in his pre-season upset special and did acknowledge that it is now not an upset cause State is favored. Says Michigan State is the most underrated team in the country and is incredibly physical. Notre Dame is coming off a huge emotional win and that is trouble. Herd is picking Michigan State to win and cover by the score of 33-20.
Georgia at Arizona State (+7) – Georgia does not travel period, has a questionable O-line and plays 12 freshmen. Arizona State has a great QB and has fixed a lot of their OL trouble from last year. Herd thinks Georgia wins 27-23, which means Arizona State covers.
Florida at Tennessee – He did not give a line here. Says the team that runs better wins this game. Tennessee has never beat Urban Meyer. Last year Florida blew them out and rubbed it in by saying The Vols quit. This year Tennessee is the better rushing team, plays at home and has a chip on their shoulder. The Herd thinks Florida wins 24-23 but Tennessee covers the points.
Flash and Runny
Some record keeping from last week:
RPJ Syndicate is 4-1
Flash Flash for the Cash is 2-0
Runny Pelvis the Fat is 1-1
Heidi Klum is hot as hell!!!
Yup hot chicks won out!!! Thanks for your input.
How this blog works is as follows. Flash Flash and Runny merge two successful betting systems to optimize their picks. RPJ Syndicate is our combined effort. Our solo picks are picks that failed one of our betting systems but each individual handicapper still loves and wants to put out there for our readers. The single most important fact is this…..we put our money where our mouth is!!! We share the gain, like last week, and share the pain, which is inevitable to bite us in the ass once in a blue moon and hopefully never but ee are realists and know that shiznit happens so we are not going to sit here and say we are always perfect or winners like our rivals. They are full of Lexington Steele’s cahk, in their anus, and are just trying to make a quick buck at your expense. Over the course of the season we will win more than we lose and the proof is in our results plain and simple. We know some of you are winning with us because you share your gains with us via email at email@example.com to the tune of thousands of dollars. You know who you are and please keep up the dialogue and share your thoughts with us.
This is always a little scary when we love this many games but we have to put our money to work when things are this good. We come at you with 8 games this weekend. On with the picks…..
RPJ PICKS (4-1 on the season)
These are all 1 unit bets for us. We think it is still too early to jack up some of these games.
Eastern Michigan at Michigan State (-21) – Michigan State is coming off an emotional loss at Cal. Sorry Spartan fans but they had no chance. Teams do not travel well when they head West. Sounds like a dumb reason to lose but it is the fact. Just ask Vols fans this week. Coach Dantonio is a good coach and has the Spartans moving down the right path. Javon Ringer is one of the best players in the Big Ten and one of the most overlooked players in football. He will break out this game.
Some ATS numbers:
Eastern Michigan Eagles
Eagles are 2-5 ATS in their last 7 games following a S.U. win.
Eagles are 6-21 ATS in their last 27 non-conference games.
Eagles are 2-7 ATS in their last 9 vs. Big Ten.
Eagles are 1-5 ATS in their last 6 games in September.
Michigan State Spartans
Looks to us like the Eagles do not play well after wins, out of conference, in September and versus the Big Ten. We smell an old fashioned arse whooping. Take Michigan State to the bank with an easy cover!
Central Michigan @ Georgia (-24) – This is the most painful bet we will ever lay. Yes we are going to bet against The Fever.
Dan LeFevour is simply the man. We admit that we have man-crushes. If Tebow was not playing right now all anybody would be talking about is The Fever. Fever is the second player in history to pass for more than 3,000 yards and rush for more than 1,000 yards. Vince Young was the first. Also, keep in mind that with all the well deserved accolades laid down on Tebow last year, The Fever was one rushing TD away from reaching the 20-20 club that won Tebow the Heisman (The Fever had 27 passing TD’s to Tebow’s 32).
The ATS numbers for both schools are good:
Chippewas are 4-1-2 ATS in their last 7 road games.
Chippewas are 7-2 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Chippewas are 24-7-3 ATS in their last 34 games overall.
Chippewas are 6-2-1 ATS in their last 9 games on grass.
Chippewas are 6-2 ATS in their last 8 games in September.
Chippewas are 14-5-2 ATS in their last 21 games following a S.U. win.
Bulldogs are 4-0 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Bulldogs are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games following a S.U. win.
Bulldogs are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games overall.
Bulldogs are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games on grass.
Bulldogs are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 non-conference games.
Bulldogs are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 home games.
It is a sad day but as Clemson proved last year, and that was Clemson, The Chips can not compete with elite competition. Bulldogs win big and cover!!!! Sorry Dan but we will jump back on your bandwagon later in the season.
BYU (-9) at Washington – BYU had the turnover jitters last week and still won 41-17. Washington pulled a Willingham and competed for one half before getting decimated in the second half. BYU always plays tough and has some experience winning against the Pac-10. Willingham is a clown and can not get talent to Washington and guards his players and practices with a steel curtain. He needs to look South to see that Pete Carroll holds open practices. Does this look like the face of a winner? Body language says it all.
The ATS numbers:
Cougars are 7-2 ATS vs. a team with a losing record.
Cougars are 5-2 ATS in their last 7 games in September.
Cougars are 7-3-1 ATS in their last 11 games following a SU win of more than 20 points.
Cougars are 20-9-1 ATS in their last 30 games overall.
Cougars are 11-5 ATS in their last 16 road games.
Huskies are 11-27-2 ATS in their last 40 home games.
Huskies are 7-19 ATS in their last 26 home games vs. a team with a winning road record.
Huskies are 1-5 ATS in their last 6 games on turf.
Washington has zero chance of winning this game. BYU is for real and will play in a decent bowl. 10 points should be enough. Take BYU to cover against the suckfest that is Ty Willingham. If you were not aware, Washington coach Ty Willingham is 6-21 in the Pac-10 and 1-9 against the other Northwest teams. So to reiterate….Take BYU to win and cover!!!
Ole Miss at Wake Forest (-7.5) – We are following one of our rules, Ole Miss will not travel well out of conference. Wake Forest is coming off an impressive easy win at Baylor and is coming home, after their first win ever in Texas and to a new stadium. They are going to fight like hell for that first home win and it will come at Ole Miss’ expense. Houston Nutt versus Jim Grobe is no contest. Wake beat these guys in 2006 in Mississippi and should not be worried at home. Houston Nutt is not the savior Ole Miss fans think he is and he does not have Run DMC or Felix Jones to save his ass every week like they did last year when he coached at Arkansas. Wake plays solid D, efficient O and has the coaching advantage while playing at home. Throw in the fact that Ole Miss has lost 4 straight road openers and 13 of 14 and you know what we are cooking here. The ATS numbers:
Rebels are 7-19 ATS in their last 26 games in September.
Rebels are 3-9 ATS in their last 12 non-conference games.
Demon Deacons are 6-0 ATS in their last 6 games following a S.U. win.
Demon Deacons are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 non-conference games.
Demon Deacons are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games overall.
Demon Deacons are 5-0 ATS in their last 5 home games.
Demon Deacons are 6-1 ATS in their last 7 games on grass.
Demon Deacons are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games following a ATS win.
Demon Deacons are 13-3 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
The Demon Deacons go to 2-0 and although we would love to see this line under 7 we think a 10 point Wake win is not out of the question. Take Wake to win and cover!!!
West Virginia at East Carolina (+7.5) – This smells like a little bit of let down city to us. E. Carolina is coming off an emotional upset of Va. Tech and now has to come right back to face Pat White and West Virginia. Yes the same Pat White and West Virginia that beat their ass 48-7 last year. Check out the highlights if you want to predict this weekend.
West Virginia has beaten East Carolina seven straight times since 2000, outscoring them 278-103. Take a look at the ATS numbers:
Mountaineers are 8-2 ATS in their last 10 games on grass.
Mountaineers are 13-5 ATS in their last 18 road games.
Pirates are 4-0 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Pirates are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games on grass.
Pirates are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 home games.
Pirates are 11-3 ATS in their last 14 games in September.
Pirates are 21-8 ATS in their last 29 games overall.
Pirates are 10-4 ATS in their last 14 non-conference games.
Pirates are 13-6 ATS in their last 19 games following a S.U. win.
Pirates are 3-7 ATS in their last 10 vs. Big East.
That last one really sticks out to us. If the Pirates do not line up well against the Big East then they are going to have problems with White and Devine. Throw in the fact that the Mountaineers are 5-2 ATS in their last 7 meetings and we are loving West Virginia. Pat White, our dark horse Heisman candidate, is going to roll in this game. Take West Virginia to win and cover.
Minnesota at Bowling Green (-5.5) – We love this game. Bowling Green coming home after an awesome win at Pitt to face one of the bottom dwellers of the Big 10. We do not think the MAC is so far off talent wise compared to the Big Ten and this game will prove it. Minnesota barely beat MAC bottom dweller Northern Illinois at home and did not cover last week.
The ATS trends:
Golden Gophers are 1-5-1 ATS in their last 7 games in September.
Golden Gophers are 0-4 ATS in their last 4 non-conference games.
Falcons are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games overall.
Falcons are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games on grass.
Bowling Green is going to be jacked up at home and will defend their home field. Take Bowling Green for an easy win and cover!!!
Miami at Florida (-22.5) – This is going to be a fun game. 8PM, prime time, Tebow’s first game versus “The U” and the Gators trying to end a 23 year winless streak. It is hard to believe all of that is true but the facts are the facts. Florida is still tough to read because Coach Meyer wants us all to believe he is going to protect Tebow from the pounding he faced last year but in reality the only way they are going to win games is if Tebow is Tebow. And that Tebow loves to hold and cuddle big men. See for yourself.
The Gators will live and die with Tebow. The U is working towards regaining some of its lost luster and potentially has the speed on defense to keep this game in check. Also, they have Robert Marve, from the state of Florida and the QB who broke a lot of Tebow’s records. This is a brutal place to start your first game but Marve has the talent. The Florida schools have a certain rivalry and bragging rights and The U lives by this creed. 22.5 points is a lot to cover in a state game of this magnitude. The ATS numbers:
Hurricanes are 3-7 ATS in their last 10 road games.
Hurricanes are 3-8 ATS in their last 11 non-conference games.
Hurricanes are 7-19 ATS in their last 26 games following a SU win of more than 20 points.
Hurricanes are 7-19-1 ATS in their last 27 games overall.
Hurricanes are 3-9 ATS in their last 12 games in September.
Hurricanes are 1-6 ATS in their last 7 games on grass.
Hurricanes are 1-7 ATS in their last 8 games following a S.U. win.
Gators are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games on grass.
Gators are 10-2 ATS in their last 12 non-conference games.
Gators are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games overall.
Gators are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 home games.
Gators are 2-5 ATS in their last 7 games in September.
We think this is a tough one to peg but think The U is a team on the rise and 22.5 points is too many to give. We do not think The U has a chance of winning but if the final score is 45-24, which is a blowout, guess what, The U covered for you. Take Miami to cover!!!
UL Monroe at Arkansas (-13) – Arkansas did not look good last week versus Western Illinois and actually had to rally from a 24-14 4th quarter deficit to get on track and win 28-24. UL Monroe got shutout by Auburn and showed absolutely nothing. Bobby Petrino will likely face some growing pains this season but they are not going to come against UL-Monroe. Petrino is one of the best play callers in football. The UL-Monroe Warhawks will be overmatched in this game and they have already shown that they vanish on the road in SEC stadiums. The ATS numbers:
Warhawks are 14-31 ATS in their last 45 non-conference games.
Warhawks are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games in September.
Razorbacks are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 home games.
Razorbacks are 5-2 ATS in their last 7 games overall.
Razorbacks are 2-6 ATS in their last 8 non-conference games.
Razorbacks are 2-6 ATS in their last 8 games in September.
Also, and most importantly, Arkansas’ cheerleaders have great porno first names. Check this out:
Jenna and Kacey with a “K” and a “C”. I see the tag team action right now. And with a QB named Casey Dick. I can see the porno headline right now…..”Jenna and Kacey love Casey’s Dick” We could go on for hours with this. “Casey’s Dick deep inside Jenna and Kacey” Alright you get the point. Those ATS numbers for Arkansas were all under Houston “likes to suck” Nutt so we are not concerned. Arkansas will roll easily in this game so take them to cover!!!
Flash Flash picks (2-0 on the season)
Only one pick from me this week……Texas will thrash UTEP. UTEP gets thrashed by Buffalo, not the Buffalo Bills, but U of B. What a joke. Texas squashes UTEP big. You heard it here first.
Runny Pelvis Picks (1-1 after Week 1, 1-2 on the Season, damn Gamecocks, they probably got ahold of Casey’s Dick too!)
Navy @ Ball State (-6.5): I love the MAC and I love the Testicular Ones to win it this year. They are stacked at QB, they have outstanding wideouts and Dave Letterman is an alumn. I like Navy, too, just not in this game. Losing Coach Johnson will be a big deal. I’m taking Ball State at home -6.5.
Akron @ CUSE (-4.5): Normally CUSE giving any amount of points to any team is begging you to go against them. They are bad and their coach will be gone by the end of the year. Couple that with the fact that Akron is not a bad team and could win the MAC this year and it is a recipe to take Akron and run. I don’t buy it. CUSE is 10-1-1 in their last 12 against the MAC. I love them in The Dome. Take CUSE -4.5.
Stanford @ ASU (-14): Stanford surprised us with their win last week against Oregon State. Very surprising. Jim Harbaugh has a good idea of where he is taking this program and he is a good coach. However, ASU is just too stacked. Rudy Carpenter is legit and plays with a lot of heart. ASU just has too much ammo for the Cardinals. Also, the home team is 6-2 ATS in their last 8. Take ASU -14.
S.Miss +17.5 @ Auburn: Call me crazy, because on paper Auburn should destroy S.Miss. But, that’s why they play the games!!! S. Miss is up-and-coming and their new coach, Larry Fedora, knows how to run an offense. They will catch Auburn sleeping. Plus, S. Miss is 4-0 ATS in their last 4 match-ups with Auburn. Take S. Miss +17.5.
Keep the emails coming at firstname.lastname@example.org and hit us up on this blog in our comment section. We are here to help and make everybody money and stare at Keyra Augustina’s delightful ass.
Flash Flash and Runny
We think the best way to sum up this past weekend is to reveal the Las Vegas Sports Consultants top 5 poll. These guys are in the know and know a lot more than the ridiculous AP poll and the other garbage out there. Here is the poll in reverse order:
5) Florida – Impressive win over a bad team. They do not need Tebow to roll and this will be key to getting through the SEC. This is the ONLY SEC team in the top 5. You SEC homers can start your bitching.
4) Missouri – A little surprised here because the defense did not show up. Offense is ridiculous.
3) Oklahoma – Two teams from the Big 12. How about that. Remember what we said about QBs. The best group of QBs in the nation is in the Big 12.
2) Ohio State – We think this is a little bit overrated. Beanie is hurt and they did not impress against 1-AA talent. Team is still getting props for all of their returning starters and that is an important metric to track in the beginning of the season.
1) USC – Did not play that well and dominated a terrified Virginia team. Defense is ridiculous when focused and lost focus early when they knew they would not face a challenge. Great WR play highlighted the offense. D. Williams is a huge addition. Looks like the replacement for Steve Smith.
Other notables. The Big East and the ACC were and are awful. Clemson laid a huge egg as did Virginia Tech and Tennessee. Fulmer should be fired after that horrible performance. Tennessee caused four first half turnovers and held UCLA to 29 yards rushing and LOST!!!! One more time….they freakin LOST!!!!! Incredible.
The basic fact of college football is as follows. There are only two team that travel well 2,000 miles or more out of conference and that is USC and Fresno State. Props to Fresno for jacking up Rutgers. Tennessee can not do it two years in a row. Big Ten teams do not do well when they travel West; Rose Bowls and Michigan State this weekend. The reality is that teams protect their home field. Rivalry games are incredibly more important and demanding then out of conference road games. People think the SEC is the best conference because of the teams in the conference when in reality it is the rivalries. Almost every single game is a huge rivalry in the SEC and that creates the demanding pressure and creates battle tested teams. Ohio State has one rivalry game in conference, Oklahoma has Texas and vice versa, the Big East and ACC lack big rivalry games. The Pac-10 has a couple but everybody is really trying to beat USC. The reality is the SEC has more rivalry games and that is why the games are so tough and the teams do well in bowls. They are battle tested.
Player of the Week – Pat White tore it up for West Virginia. Watch out for this team. They have an awesome QB, lots of skilled players around him and play in the Big East. They easily could run the table and this is a team on a mission with a bitter taste in their mouth following their PITT debacle last year.
Team of the Week – Most impressive win has to be East Carolina. They came back and won on special teams. Complete reversal against Virginia Tech. We love Beamer ball but Holtz got the best of him this year.
Poo of the week – Tie between Clemson and Tennessee. Tennessee wins hands down because we thought Alabama had a good chance of winning and Clemson was overrated. Tennessee’s loss is inexcuseable. UCLA is bad, very bad and this will play out over the course of the season.
Stay tuned for our picks for Week 2. Feel free to post any comments or questions. We are here to help you. If you want any inside action feel free to shoot us an email at email@example.com. Also, let us know if you want us to post hot chick pictures and with or without nudity.
We love cash like a fat kid loves cake!!!
Flash Flash and Runny Pelvis the Fat
We like to make note of handicappers that seem to be in the know whether or not they are good or bad handicappers. ESPN Radio’s Colin Cowherd always has Vegas insiders on his show and every Friday he puts out his picks of the week known as The Wheel of Genius. A lot of the time he is a blowhard and toots his own horn a little too much. We are going to keep track of him this year. He claims to have never had a losing season and last year we think he inflated his numbers significantly. One thing Colin always does do though is have one or two perfect weekends. His picks are worth throwing in a parlay for when he does hit it big. Here are his picks for week 1:
USC to cover against UVA
Missouri to cover against Illinois
Tennessee to cover against UCLA
Utah to cover against Michigan
Cal to cover against Michigan State
Oregon to cover again Washington
Here are Colin’s picks and yes we will be watching and monitoring him. We are keeping a close eye on you Mr. Cowherd and your picks will be tracked.
Flash Flash and Runny
We are back with our picks for the rest of the weekend and are more excited than ever. All of our picks for this weekend are one unit bets. We do not like to get ahead of ourselves to start the season. The key to any successful gambling venture is bankroll protection. We do not see a Miss St./LSU scenario or USC/Arkansas like we did the last three years. The odds makers are tightening up the ship and we will wait patiently for them to mess up and for our models to identify blatant money making opportunities. Stay patient, manage your bankroll smartly and get ready to pounce when we tell you to.
As any of our readers know, typically we only post picks that we (Flash and Runny) absolutely agree on 100%. No exceptions. Even when we have guest appearences from our degenerates, like Maury the Wig, who posts picks, we must agree with those picks to post. We haggle with each other over nearly every game to get to the games we feel are our locks. We do this because we firmly believe that competion and street fighting leads to the best results. So, when we make an RPJ pick you can rest assured that it is a pick that has been discussed, and dicussed and discussed until we are both bloody.
That said, we are adding a new wrinkle to our game. This year, in addition to the RPJ picks we will post, we will also show you other picks that each of us feel are locks, but did not survive the Flash-Runny battle royale. Our reason for doing this is the same….competion breeds excellence. We are only about winning. Winning big and decimating our competitors (i.e. Vegas) Ragnar Lodbrok-style. We fight so much for our picks that we even want to beat each other!!
On with the picks…..
WEEK 1 PICKS continued
Saturday, August 30, 2008
USC at Virginia (+19.5) – Virginia is a mess. This is not the same team as last year. The QB is gone from the team and their best defensive player is playing on Sundays. For UVA, Last year was the year of the right bounces and winning every close game. This year is not going to be fun for Virginia as Clemson and Wake are solid and Miami, UNC and FSU are all better. USC did not impress in their opener last year against Idaho and the Trojans tend to start the season slowly. Also, Sanchez was injured during the first week of camp and is just back to practice.
However, this week, Sanchez looks great and we believe USC has the best defense in the country. Take into consideration that USC is the only prgram in D-1 that practices its starting offense against its starting defense. This means USC will be ready to pound UVA on both sides of the ball. The best defense USC’s offense will see all year is its own. Only way to really highlight USC’s defense is to showcase one of their leaders…Rey Maualuga. Rey might actually kill somebody on the field this year by hitting them into the third sphere of hell.
and of course you can not ignore Taylor Mays….
These boys can lay some lumber. Some ATS stats:
Trojans are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games on grass.
Trojans are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games overall.
Trojans are 20-7 ATS in their last 27 non-conference games.
Cavaliers are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games in August.
Cavaliers are 2-7 ATS in their last 9 non-conference games.
We do not think UVA’s August record will matter and see USC absolutely pounding the run all day. USC wins big and probably by at least 4 TDs because the Cavs will not be able to score. Remember the USC/Arkansas scores.
Alabama at (neutral site) Clemson (-4.5) – This is probably the most interesting game of the first weekend. All of the pressure is on Clemson. They are picked by the “experts” to win the ACC, to play in a BCS bowl game and are favored to win this game. If this game were in Death Valley it would be a different story but it is not. The Tide and Saban are coming off a disappointing 7-6 season and are looking to make a statement early. We all know Saban will turn this team around, just give him 2 more recruiting classes as good as his class this past year and SEC foes should look out. Tommy Bowden is a big choke artist and will be fired if he does not meet and/or exceed the lofty pre-season expectations. Does this look like a coach that can lead your team to the promised land?
We do not trust him to wipe his own ass and his roids are clearly flaring up in this pic.
Alabama has beaten Clemson 11 straight times, but the last meeting was in 1975. Saban is the better coach and will have a month to prepare for Clemson and that will be a huge advantage. The ATS numbers are bad for both teams:
Crimson Tide are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 non-conference games.
Crimson Tide are 2-9 ATS in their last 11 games overall.
Tigers are 1-5 ATS in their last 6 non-conference games.
Tigers are 0-4 ATS in their last 4 vs. SEC.
The ATS point that sticks out the most is Clemson versus the SEC. Coaching and location, two underrated handicapping points, will dictate this game. Alabama (+4.5) will cover and do not be surprised if they pull the upset.
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Colorado at (neutral site) Colorado State (+11) – We already pointed out in our Vegas preview piece that the Big 12 has the most elite talent at QB in the country and Colorado is part of that picture. QB Cody Hawkins looks good running the new spread offense at Colorado and he was challenged by his backups in camp. The competition has been healthy and will only make Cody better. He is a scrapper and the Buffs were scrappy last year. They beat Oklahoma and Texas Tech so they have the confidence that they can beat anybody anywhere. Always remember one thing….the reason you have heard of Boise State is because of Colorado’s coach, Dan Hawkins. Hawkins put Boise State on the map and then was hired away to restore Colorado’s program. This team is young and is starting to get the talent needed to compete with every team in the Big 12. A little birdy told us that when Hawkins showed up in 2006 he did not think the team possessed one legit D-1 athlete. Taking that into consideration we think he has done a great job. The Buffs went 2-10 in 2006 and 6-7 in 2007. We think they will improve and end the year with a winning record. We have one reason to shit on Colorado State and it comes from this press conference. Please click here to laugh at these tools.
Here is the injured star of Colorado State….
Any D-1 coach that opens a press conference during game week and talks about his kicker is an idiot. It is clear this clown has never coached D-1 before. Colorado is going to drop huge Buffalo turds all over this team. Plus, Colorado has probably the best freshman running back in the country in Darrell Scott. This kid can straight bowl over defenses. He will be an immediate starter. He probably get 150 yards in his debut.
Well these ATS numbers are a mess:
Buffaloes are 2-5 ATS in their last 7 games overall.
Buffaloes are 4-10 ATS in their last 14 vs. MWC.
Buffaloes are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games on grass.
Rams are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games on grass.
Rams are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games overall.
Road team is 4-1 ATS in their last 5 meetings.
Underdog is 10-2 ATS in their last 12 meetings.
The Buffalos are legit this year. No way Colorado State keeps it close, even in a rivalry game. Team Hawkins is too damn good. Take the Buffs (-11) to the bank!!!
Monday, September 1, 2008
Tennessee at UCLA (+7.5) – Last year Tennessee traveled to play Cal and was thrashed. Of course that Tennessee team was good enough to play in the SEC championship game. What a freakin joke. The team that plays in the SEC championship can not even beat a team in the bottom half of the Pac-10. Where was the media to talk about that one? This year The Vols travel to play a UCLA team that is nowhere close to Cal’s talent level from last year. UCLA has a new coach, a new offense and injuries to their 1st and 2nd string QBs. Their new coach is also trying to make himself a public figure with ridiculous ads in the local LA papers. He needs to focus on recruiting and boosting the talent on his roster. Go bet on some more March Madness pools Rick.
Is UCLA serious with that crap?!?!?! Worse ad ever. The USC band has more 5 star recruits than UCLA has had in the past 10 years combined. Tennessee is the superior team top to bottom and this game does not really need any detail. The line should be in the double digits and we are jumping on it under 10. The ATS numbers:
Volunteers are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 non-conference games.
Volunteers are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games on grass.
Volunteers are 5-1-1 ATS in their last 7 games overall.
Volunteers are 5-2 ATS in their last 7 games in September.
Bruins are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games on grass.
Bruins are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games overall.
Bruins are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 vs. SEC.
Bruins are 20-7 ATS in their last 27 home games.
Bruins are 19-7-1 ATS in their last 27 games in September.
Don’t buy UCLA’s ATS numbers. UCLA is not good and simply does not have the talent to match up with Tennessee. The Vols win this one by more than 10 and if they do not then the SEC is SOFT as hell this year.
We are introducing a new feature this year. Flash Flash and Runny work well together because we only pick games where every single one of our bet criteria are met. This is why we might only focus on 3-8 games each week. It simply means our models do not mesh up. This year we are going to publish our individual picks outside of RPJ Syndicate’s picks. We are not going to give you detailed reasons for our explanations but we are going to track our individual metrics outside of The Syndicate so you can see more picks.
Flash Flash Picks
Illinois (+8.5) at (neutral site but not really) Missouri – One of the best QBs in the nation, Daniel, playing at their home away from home in the Loo. Love Maclin too. Illinois will not be as good as last year minus Mendenhall. Missouri easily wins by more than 10.
Oklahoma St. at Washington St. (+7.5) – Both teams will score but Washington State’s defense is more inept that Oklahoma State’s is and that will be enough for the Cowboys to win by more than 10. Loving Ok. St. in this one.
Bowling Green at Pitt (-13) – Some analysts have picked Bowling Green to win the MAC. They averaged 30.2 points and 402.5 yeards per game last year. Plus, they return their leading QB. However, I just don’t see them competing in the up-and-coming MAC. The architect behind thier offense, O-Coordinator Mick McCall, left to take the same position at Northwestern. Also, their o-line has three new starters. Pitt’s D will eat this up. Pitt has one of the best front 7 in NCAA. Also, Pitt’s D was ranked #5 in total D last year and they return 6 starters. Their D is extrememly deep. Throw in LeSean McCoy and this will be a beatdown. McCoy may drop 200 on them. Take Pitt (-13) all the way to the bank!!!!
Utah (+3.5) @ Michigan – Rich Rodriguez’s Ann Arbor and much anticipated Michigan blue. No doubt he is a phenomenal coach and can get as much out of his players as anyone. I’m a huge fan. However, he can only do so much in so little time. He is implementing his spread offense in a team that just does not have the personnel yet. Rodriguez knows this, and I’m sure he will do the best he can with what he has. Michigan does have a stacked D and return 8 starters, including everyone on their line. They will definitely be the positive in this game for the maize and blue. However, they will be going against a team that runs the spread offense, too. A team that has been doing it much longer and has many more suitable players. QB Brian Johnson is back and finally healthy. This kid has serious wheels and can sling it. To back him up, Sophmore Corbin Louks can come in for a spell much like Tebow did his freshman year. They return their starting RB and a JuCo transfer in Matt Asiata who can run all day. They can guide this offense against Michigan’s D enough to keep this close. It will be the Utes D that stiffles Michigan’s new offense enough to keep it close. Don’t be surprised if the Utes go into Ann Arbor and silence the world’s quietest 100,000+ fans. Take the Utes +3.5. Don’t forget….Ann Arbor is a whore!!!
Enjoy the picks!!!
Flash Flash and Runny
Stay tuned for NFL picks next week. Feel free to post anything you want on this blog or to email us at firstname.lastname@example.org. We are here for our readers and want you to make as much money as possible this season.
Happy New Year!!! We hope you are not still hungover and have enough energy to place some winning bets with us. We are coming at you today with winning picks on 5 games. We are really excited because this is the first time we are coming at you with our Super Keyra bet. Keep reading to find out which bowl that is for. Here are our picks:
We have two Heidi Klum bets for you today:
1 Unit Bet = The Heidi Klum bet. You know she is hot but her judgement must be suspect cause she married one of the ugliest human beings outside of Scottie Pippen, Sam Cassell and Charlie Weis (of course we took a dig at Notre Dame in this blog). We love the Heidi Klum but something is off with her judgement so we are only comfortable making her a a one unit bet.
These are the same pictures that gave us our first win this bowl season so we are being superstitious and going back to them:
and the infamous Butt Crack:
Klum Game 1 – Tennessee (-1.5) versus Wisconsin in the Outback Bowl
We love when we see SEC schools squaring off against Big Ten schools and this game should show America the difference between the two conferences just like it did last year. Tennessee is scoring 33.4 points per game, about three points more than the Badgers this season and that is why the line is set where it is set. Now Tennessee’s defense is nothing to talk about but when they face a basic offense like Wisconsin’s, and rumor has it that PJ Hill is still banged up, we have to think Tennessee will be good enough to deal with them, especially after they only gave up 21 points to an LSU team that has a far superior offense to Wisconsin. Lets look at the ATS numbers:
Badgers are 3-7 ATS in their last 10 games overall.
Badgers are 2-6 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Badgers are 1-5 ATS in their last 6 games after accumulating more than 200 yards rushing in their previous game.
Badgers are 1-6 ATS in their last 7 games following a straight up win.
Volunteers are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games after allowing more than 200 yards rushing in their previous game.
Volunteers are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games following a straight up loss.
Volunteers are 5-1-1 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Volunteers are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games on grass.
Volunteers are 4-1-1 ATS in their last 6 games overall.
Volunteers are 5-2 ATS in their last 7 games as a favorite.
Volunteers are 5-2 ATS in their last 7 non-conference games.
This game is in Tampa so you know the SEC faithful will pack Raymond James stadium. Wisconsin usually gets stuck in these games against an SEC school and has won this matchup the last two seasons. We think Wisconsin is a different team without PJ Hill and we bet he was worth 2-3 points to the oddsmakers. Both QBs have experience but Ainge gets the edge here. We are only assigning this a Klum bet cause the Badgers show up against the SEC but we think this is the year that changes. Tennessee wins and covers!!!
Klum Game #2 – Hawaii versus Georgia (-7.5) in the Allstate Sugar Bowl Classic
We think this game has the betters thinking of Oklahoma versus Boise State from last year. The line opened at Georgia -9.5 and is now at Georgia -7.5, which shows that all of the money is going on Hawaii. Hawaii played one of the softest D-1 schedules ever this season. Yes, they did take care of business when it mattered but they barely scraped by. We also know that Georgia feels slighted from the BCS championship game after LSU jumped them after winning the SEC championship game. Mark Richt, the Georgia coach, has openly criticized the system and this is the one thing that makes us nervous. We hope Richt put this behind him and has helped get his Dawg squad ready to win. Lets check out the ATS numbers:
Warriors are 2-5 ATS in their last 7 games after accumulating more than 280 yards passing in their previous game.
Warriors are 2-5 ATS in their last 7 games following a straight up win.
Warriors are 2-5 ATS in their last 7 games overall.
Warriors are 7-18 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Bulldogs are 4-1 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Bulldogs are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 neutral site games.
Bulldogs are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games following a straight up win.
Bulldogs are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games overall.
We all know the deal here. Colt Brennan is the man and June Jones has the run and gun going and they play in the same conference as Boise State, Boise State was undefeated last year and beat Oklahoma….Blah Blah Blah. Georgia is one of the hottest teams in the country right now. Georgia has not lost a game since they inserted Freshmen Knowshon Moreno into the starting lineup. They have a six game winning streak going. Georgia amassed 25 sacks over its six-game winning streak to close the season and that is something Hawaii has not seen yet this year. This Georgia defense will really get after Brennan and he has shown a tendancy to get hurt this year. we are only throwing a Klum bet on this because we know what can happen in this wild and whacky bowl season. We do know we are betting Georgia and expect them to win and cover!!!!
So that was two Klum games. We are following that up with two Derek Jeter games.
2 Unit Bet = The Derek Jeter Bet – In honor of one of our favorite athletes, the 2 unit bet will be a tribute to all of the women Derek Jeter has allegedly slept with including, Jessica Biel, Scarlett Johanson, Mariah Carey, Anna Kournikouva, Miss Universes, models, etc…. We have a ton of chicks to choose for this bet in honor of our man Derek Jeter.
Lets show off two hot chicks that Jeter has allegedly banged: First Miss Jessica Alba:
We are sure Jeter fired his guns at her. And now one of his other alleged conquests…Miss Vanessa Minnillo:
Yeah Jeter hit this before she got with Nick Lachay and the backside of course:
Jeter Game 1 – Arkansas versus Missouri (-3) in the ATandT Cotton Bowl Classic
Missouri had a great season if you take out playing Oklahoma. However, Missouri definitely feels slighted because they finished 6th in the BCS standings and are not playing in a BCS game. This will be a game of run versus pass…Missouri is the 7th rated passing team in the nation and Arkansas is the 3rd rates rushing offense in the country. Missouri actually has a rush defense and only gave up 118.8 yards per game on the season. Lets get into the ATS numbers:
Razorbacks are 2-5 ATS in their last 7 non-conference games.
Tigers are 5-0 ATS in their last 5 non-conference games.
Tigers are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 neutral site games.
Tigers are 8-2 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Tigers are 8-2 ATS in their last 10 games as a favorite.
Tigers are 11-3 ATS in their last 14 games overall.
Tigers are 11-3 ATS in their last 14 games following a ATS loss.
Tigers are 8-3 ATS in their last 11 games following a straight up loss.
Tigers are 5-2 ATS in their last 7 games after scoring less than 20 points in their previous game.
Tigers are 9-4-1 ATS in their last 14 games following a double-digit loss at home.
As you can see, Missouri has the clear edge with its ATS numbers. Throw in the fact that Arkansas’ coach, Houston Nutt, resigned after they beat LSU and defected to Ole Miss and you have to like the consistency that Missouri will have. Missouri is definitely disappointed they could not beat Oklahoma but they have a great QB, dynamic offense and a defense that can stop the run and we can see this game getting out of hand. We are sure McFadden and Jones will have their moments but if Missouri gets ahead, as we expect, Arkansas is in no shape to pass its way to victory. Jump on with our Boy Derek Jeter and play Missouri to win and cover!!!!
Jeter Game 2 – USC (-14) versus Illinois in the Rose Bowl
We had our ups and downs with USC this year and this game seems like it should be an easy one for the Trojans. The spread is the highest of all of the Bowl games and Illinois did not lose any games this year by more than 10 points. They even played Missouri tough in a 7 point loss to open the season. Both teams are riding 4 game winning streaks. The real difference in this game is USC’s defense. The Trojans rank second in the country in total defense, fourth in scoring defense and fourth in rushing defense. USC allowed just 15.9 points per game. Lets look at the ATS numbers before we throw our pick out:
Fighting Illini are 2-6 ATS in their last 8 games after allowing more than 280 yards passing in their previous game.
Fighting Illini are 3-11 ATS in their last 14 games on grass.
Fighting Illini are 1-5 ATS in their last 6 non-conference games.
Trojans are 6-0 ATS in their last 6 vs. Big Ten.
Trojans are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games in January.
Trojans are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games as a favorite.
Trojans are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 Bowl games.
Trojans are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 bowl games.
Trojans are 9-3 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Trojans are 19-7 ATS in their last 26 non-conference games.
Trojans are 8-3 ATS in their last 11 games after allowing less than 20 points in their previous game.
Trojans are 5-2 ATS in their last 7 games following a ATS loss.
Bettors are likely to jump on Illinois because everybody remembers the following three games against mobile QBs…Texas/USC, Washington/USC this year (27-24) and USC’s loss to Dennis Dixon this year. The big difference is that Illinois is a run first team and averaged 266 yards rushing per game. Juice William’s, The Illini mobile QB, ran for 774 yards and 7 TDs and only passed for 1,498 yards with 13 TDs and 10 INTs. Illinois is a run first team and pass second. We already told you how good USC’s defense is and we think Illinois will be completely neutralized. This is not the typical mobile QB that is just as dynamic passing as he is running. Do not fear the points. If you want us to go into more detail on this game we will be happy to. We just see no need. Beat Down Cometh!!! USC wins and covers easily!!!!
THE BET OF ALL BETS THIS SEASON
We are throwing out our first Keyra bet on the following game.
The Super Bet = The Keyra Shake that Money Maker bet – These will be our super lock bets. The bets we are taking out second mortgages, bank loans, hitting up friends and relatives…you get the picture. Bet as much as you can stomach bets. If you are not familiar with our gal Keyra, check out this action. This has to be one of the best videos ever put on the Internet:
Say this three times…I wish I was a red thong, I wish I was a red thong, I wish I was a red thong:
Or if red is not your color, I wish I was a black thong, I wish I was a black thong, I wish I was a black thong:
Man that makes us feel good. On with “THE GAME” of the bowl season:
Michigan versus Florida (-11) in the Capital One Bowl
We love this game and our write up will not hide our bias in any way. The Wolverines faced two legit spread option teams this year (and we are not counting Illinois for reasons explained above). Appalachian State ran Michigan out of their own house and Oregon really pounded the Wolverines. The Wolverine seniors have never won a bowl game and they never played well for Coach Lloyd Carr so we see no reason why they will play hard for him during this game. Michigan did have four key players injured this year and you never know when the injury bug will bite them again: QB Chad Henne, RB Mike Hart, WR Mario Manningham and OT Jake Long. These guys are all expected to play but will they be able to play the whole game. Florida has the 4th best scoring offense in the country at 43 points per game. Do you know how many times Michigan scored 43 points this year….1 time (against Purdue) and that was the only time they scored 40 this season. Everybody knows how good Tebow is and how dynamic the Gators offense is. We see zero reasons why Michigan can win this game or even have a chance competing. Florida is on a 4 game winning streak and a 4 game winning streak ATS. Check out the ATS numbers:
Wolverines are 2-5 ATS in their last 7 Bowl games.
Wolverines are 2-5 ATS in their last 7 bowl games.
Wolverines are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games after allowing more than 200 yards rushing in their previous game.
Wolverines are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 non-conference games.
Wolverines are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games after accumulating less than 275 total yards in their previous game.
Wolverines are 1-5 ATS in their last 6 games following a straight up loss.
Wolverines are 0-4 ATS in their last 4 games after accumulating less than 100 yards rushing in their previous game.
Gators are 4-0 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Gators are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games on grass.
Gators are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games as a favorite.
Gators are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 non-conference games.
Gators are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games overall.
Gators are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games after accumulating more than 450 total yards in their previous game.
Gators are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games following a straight up win of more than 20 points.
Gators are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games after allowing less than 100 yards rushing in their previous game.
Gators are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games following a ATS win.
Gators are 5-2 ATS in their last 7 games after scoring more than 40 points in their previous game.
Gators are 7-3 ATS in their last 10 games following a straight up win.
Can you just feel it? Florida is going to pound Michigan. They have a significant edge in talent, on offense, in the coaching department and Michigan can not stop the spread. Lloyd Carr is gonna wish he quit last season after an underdog USC squad beat his assin the Rose Bowl. We love this game and are betting our max on it. Florida crushes Michigan…NO CONTEST!!!
Flash Flash and Runny
To start things off this week we want to thank you the readers. As of time of this blog, we have had over 2,650 people read us this month. To go along with these thanks we want to ask for your input, advice, suggestions, etc… Please feel free to tell us we stink or to praise us. We know you all want winners and we do to because our money is always where our mouth is.
On the season we are 53-51, 6-4 on Eva Mendes bets and up 10 units. We are disappointed about the 10 unit mark because we would like to be higher for the bowl season but we will take it. If you listened to us, you made money and that is what matters most to us. Straight Cash Homey!!!!!
We have 9 picks for you this week but we do not have an Eva Mendes bet. Also, since we know you like it, we are going to put in as much hot tail as we can!!! Lastly, we looked at every single game this weekend so if you want our opinion or any stats or lines please let us know by leaving us a comment on this blog or emailing us directly at email@example.com.
The Hot Dirty Girl Games. Basically we are jumping on the two Florida teams nobody talks about….Central Florida and Florida International. The Hot Dirty Girl Game means these are chicks nobody is thinking about. They are not the South Beach hotties or Miami models, they are simply hot, probably dirty and we love them!!!!!
Boobs and camel toe…Only in a Hooters Girl competition.
Game 1 – Tulsa at Central Florida (-7.5) – We know some people are going to jump on Tulsa but we thought this line was too low. Check out Central Florida’s games sine they lost to South Florida.
Beat Tulsa 44-23 (yeah that is right, they beat them up once already)
Beat Southern Miss 34-17
Beat Marshall 47-13
Beat UAB 45-31
Beat SMU 49-20
Beat UTEP 36-20
Then throw in the fact that Central Florida is undefeated at home this season and you have to like this game. The line opened at 6.5 and we got it at 7.5 and we are not concerned. Check out the against the spread numbers:
Golden Hurricane are 4-10-1 ATS in their last 15 games as a road underdog of 3.5-10.0.
Golden Hurricane are 3-8 ATS in their last 11 games following a straight up win.
Golden Hurricane are 3-10 ATS in their last 13 conference games.
Golden Hurricane are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games on grass.
Golden Hurricane are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 road games.
Golden Hurricane are 2-8 ATS in their last 10 games overall.
Golden Hurricane are 1-5 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Golden Hurricane are 1-6 ATS in their last 7 games following a ATS loss.
Golden Hurricane are 0-5 ATS in their last 5 road games vs. a team with a winning home record.
Knights are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games on grass.
Knights are 5-2 ATS in their last 7 home games.
Knights are 7-3 ATS in their last 10 conference games.
We love Central Florida in this game as they throw some extra dirty on this one!!!! Take Central Florida to win and cover!!!
Game 2 – North Texas at Florida International (+2.5) – This one is going to be a pretty surprising pick but we have to do it. Lets take a look at the ATS numbers first:
Mean Green are 5-12 ATS in their last 17 games on turf.
Mean Green are 1-5 ATS in their last 6 games as a favorite.
Mean Green are 0-6 ATS in their last 6 games following a straight up win.
Nothing to speak of
That is right….Florida International has nothing good to speak of. North Texas is favored statistically across the board accept for one key area….They can not stop the run compared to Florida International and this little stat tells us that Florida International will cover and possibly win. North Texas is playing for nothing and Florida International is playing for an important first win on the season. We are taking Florida International to cover!!!
Game 3 – Army at Navy (-14) – The Tomb Raider Game. Basically we wanted to show support for our troops by showing you a picture of one of the hottest chicks in the world with a gun. Enjoy!
Navy runs the ball and runs it well, almost 340 yards per game and Army gives up almost 230 yards per game. Navy’s defense is bad but not as bad as Army’ and Army has a terrible offense as well…not as bad as Notre Dame’s but it is putrid. Check out the ATS numbers:
Black Knights are 4-9-1 ATS in their last 14 games as an underdog.
Black Knights are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games in December.
Black Knights are 1-4-1 ATS in their last 6 games overall.
Black Knights are 2-8 ATS in their last 10 games following a bye week.
Midshipmen are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games in December.
Midshipmen are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 neutral site games as a favorite.
Midshipmen are 7-2 ATS in their last 9 neutral site games.
Midshipmen are 10-3 ATS in their last 13 games following a bye week.
Midshipmen are 42-20-1 ATS vs. a team with a losing record.
Then throw in the fact that the favorite is 5-1 ATS in their last 6 meetings and the Black Knights are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 meetings and you have to love Navy. We almost threw this in as an Eva Mendes bet but we could not pull the trigger in a rivalry game. Take Navy to win and cover!!!!
Game 4 – UCLA at USC (-20) – Murder Game Number 2. We picked the USC/Arizona State game perfectly. USC is on fire right now and beat the living piss out of ASU and left ASU’s QB bloody and in pain. We think this week will be more of a beatdown. It is a revenge game for USC. USC lost last year to UCLA and lost a chance to beat the crap out of Ohio State in the National Championship Game. Check out this clip form last week to see and feel the bloodiness.
Here are the ATS numbers for you:
Bruins are 2-6 ATS in their last 8 meetings.
Bruins are 0-5 ATS in their last 5 meetings in Southern California.
Trojans are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games as a favorite.
Trojans are 6-1 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Trojans are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games overall.
Trojans are 10-4 ATS in their last 14 home games vs. a team with a winning road record.
Trojans are 26-11 ATS in their last 37 home games.
Trojans are 25-11 ATS in their last 36 games as a home favorite.
Trojans are 9-4 ATS in their last 13 games on grass.
We think USC is the best team in the country right now. The only reason Vegas would set this line this high is because all of the money is picking UCLA and Vegas thinks USC wins by 21 points or more. In addition, UCLA is terrible in the Coliseum and has no offense and we think the revenge factor will be too much for them to overcome. USC wins easily, with a lot of blood and they might actually kill a UCLA player on the field this time around. They came close in Arizona but might get the job done this time. USC wins big and covers!!!
Game 5 – Florida Atlantic at Troy (-15) – The Little Trojans Bowl. the Trojans name is hot. USC is beating people’s asses and Troy is 8 and 2 against the spread on the season. So as a reward our Little Troy Trojans get linked up with the perfect chick ass….a pic from our girl Keyra. Google this chick if you have never seen her ass and videos.
Ay Carumba!!! Gotta love it!!! Here are the ATS numbers:
Owls are 3-9 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Owls are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games following a straight up win.
Owls are 2-10 ATS in their last 12 games as a road underdog.
Owls are 2-11 ATS in their last 13 games as an underdog of 10.5 or greater.
Owls are 1-6 ATS in their last 7 road games vs. a team with a winning home record.
Owls are 1-10 ATS in their last 11 games as a road underdog of 10.5 or greater.
Trojans are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games following a straight up win.
Trojans are 5-0 ATS in their last 5 games following a straight up win of more than 20 points.
Trojans are 6-0 ATS in their last 6 games after allowing less than 275 total yards in their previous game.
Trojans are 6-0 ATS in their last 6 games after accumulating more than 200 yards rushing in their previous game.
Trojans are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games after allowing less than 20 points in their previous game.
Trojans are 5-0 ATS in their last 5 games after allowing less than 100 yards rushing in their previous game.
Trojans are 6-0 ATS in their last 6 games after scoring more than 40 points in their previous game.
Trojans are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 home games.
Trojans are 7-1 ATS in their last 8 conference games.
Trojans are 6-1 ATS in their last 7 games as a favorite.
Trojans are 9-2 ATS in their last 11 games after accumulating more than 450 total yards in their previous game.
Trojans are 13-3 ATS in their last 16 games on grass.
Trojans are 13-3 ATS in their last 16 games overall.
Trojans are 4-1 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Trojans are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games following a ATS win.
Trojans are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games as a home favorite.
Trojans are 7-3 ATS in their last 10 games as a home favorite of 10.5 or greater.
Got it? Troy Trojans represent just like the USC Trojans and lays a beat down. They will reward us for that Keyra ass shot. Troy wins and covers easily!!!
Game 6 – Oregon St. at Oregon (pick em) – Could we really pick this game without showing some authentic Beaver. We did not think so.
Oregon is probably going to end this season like they did last year by losing their last few games and getting blown out in a bowl game once the team realizes they have no chance. We feel bad for them but sympathy does not put cash in our pockets. This game opened as a pick em because Autzen is a brutal place to play and Oregon State has not faired well there the last few times. Dennis Dixon is out for the season and Brady Leaf is doubtful. When you are relying on Brady Leaf you know you are in trouble. Here are the ATS numbers:
Beavers are 5-0 ATS in their last 5 games on turf.
Beavers are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 conference games.
Beavers are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games overall.
Beavers are 5-2 ATS in their last 7 games in December.
Beavers are 36-17 ATS in their last 53 games following a ATS win.
Ducks are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games after allowing less than 275 total yards in their previous game.
Ducks are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games in December.
Mrs. Flash Flash is picking Oregon. Once again she is picking against us. She is 1-3 on the season and is picking the Ducks because she played touch football in Autzen stadium three Summers ago. Sorry to the Mrs. but you will be wrong again and lose your 4th straight. Oregon State has won two in a row since losing to USC and Oregon has lost two in a row with Dixon out and were shut out by a terrible UCLA team last week. We think Oregon State snaps their streak in Eugene. Take Oregon State to win!!!
Game 7 – Pittsburgh at West Virginia (-28.5) – The Whack Bowl. You probably did not see comments from USC TE Fred Davis this week but he was talking about the prospect of West Virginia facing Missouri for the national championship game. USC tight end Fred Davis is no fan of the current BCS title-game matchup. “Missouri-West Virginia? I don’t like that,’’ Davis said. “That’s a whack bowl game. But I think Oklahoma will beat Missouri anyways.” Yes we are bitter USC blew two games this year and is not playing for a BCS title. We think they have the best team. Alright enough bitching lets see some hot chicks.
We are only looking at one ATS number this week. The Mountaineers are 1-8 ATS in their last 9 games following a ATS win. So what do you do with this game. West Virginia knows they need to win and they play for the national title. PITT is not that good. West Virginia has been explosive. We think this is a combo of two things. First is the Nebraska syndrome. The Nebraska Syndrome was what Tom Osborne used to do at Nebraska. For home games he would not blow teams out because he would play 2nd, 3rd, 4th string etc… so everybody got a chance to play in front of their family and boosters. We think this has Nebraska Syndrome written all over it. The second thing is one of our weird stats that you just need to trust us on and yes we know we went 0-2 the last time we told you about it but we are going to keep riding the percentages. So we think West Virginia will win but will not be able to cover. Take PITT for the cover!!!
Game 8 – Virginia Tech at Boston College (+4.5) – The Thanks for Trying Game. Jessica Simpson tried at her marriage, tried at an acting career and tried to look smart. Well thanks for trying Miss Simpson. You are hot as hell though.
So we want to thank Virginia Tech for trying. They tried damn hard to beat BC last time and they are trying really hard now to impress down the stretch. Well we want to thank them for trying cause trying does not put money in our pockets. We do not know one expert that is giving BC a chance in this game. BC was outplayed down in Blacksburg for 57 minutes but pulled out the win and that was on the road. The experts say Virginia Tech has been playing like one of the best teams in the country and there are even some fools lobbying for them to play in the national championship game. Please!!! Boston College has shown that they get the job done and win football games. We love that they are the underdog and are getting 4.5 points. Take a look at the ATS numbers:
Hokies are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games in December.
Eagles are 10-1 ATS in their last 11 games as an underdog of 3.5-10.0.
Eagles are 6-1 ATS in their last 7 games in December.
Eagles are 20-7 ATS in their last 27 games as an underdog.
Eagles are 12-5 ATS in their last 17 games following a ATS loss.
Eagles are 35-17 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Heads up the Hokies are 1-7 ATS in their last 8 meetings and the underdog is 7-1 ATS in their last 8 meetings. We are not sure BC will win but we think this game will be 3 points or less in margin of victory. BC is not getting any respect and Va Tech is the hot pick this week. Take BC to cover!!!
Game 9 – Tennessee at LSU (-7.5) – The Pamela Anderson Game. What do we know about Pam Anderson…She is hot, she has a sick body and she has Hep C and can literally kill you.
Well Les Miles has a nice coaching pedigree, he has top 3 talent on his team easily, he has one of the best defense in the country but his decision to puruse the Michigan job killed LSU this year. We feel sorry for LSU fans this week. Les Miles is screwing them just like he did to Oklahoma State back in 2004. The nation knows he is going to interview for the Michigan job after the SEC championship game and will likely take that position. So why the hell is he still coaching the Tigers. It is a shame because with a serious coach that is fighting for his own job and for his team, there is no way they lose at home to Arkansas. As we explained last week, Les Miles is a dud when is knows he is going to leave a team… he lost his last regular season game and the bowl game for Oklahoma State in 2004 and now he loses to Arkansas, will probably lose to Tennessee and then bail on the Tigers for Michigan. Shame on you Les Miles. Take a look at the ATS numbers:
Volunteers are 5-1 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Volunteers are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games overall.
Volunteers are 6-2 ATS in their last 8 games after allowing more than 40 points in their previous game.
Volunteers are 5-2 ATS in their last 7 games following a straight up win.
Volunteers are 5-2 ATS in their last 7 conference games.
Tigers are 2-6 ATS in their last 8 games after allowing more than 450 total yards in their previous game.
Tigers are 2-7 ATS in their last 9 games as a favorite.
Tigers are 2-7 ATS in their last 9 games overall.
Tigers are 1-5 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Tigers are 1-5 ATS in their last 6 games following a ATS loss.
Tigers are 1-6 ATS in their last 7 conference games.
Tigers are 0-5 ATS in their last 5 games after accumulating more than 200 yards rushing in their previous game.
LSU is simply getting worse on Defense and with Les Miles leaving we think LSU has little to no chance of winning this game. We are not advising the moneyline and we are taking Tennessee and the points. We were right last week against Arkansas and we will be right this week. Bet the Vols!!!
Getting back to Keyra…if you have not witnessed one of her videos you have to check this out. We felt like we needed to leave you with this heading into bowl season. This ass certainly psyches us up. You might need to register with youtube but it is worth it. Trust us.
Flash Flash and Runny
NCAA Football Week 11 Picks: Chicks and Hot Picks or Hot Chicks and Picks? Who Cares, Both are Better than Notre Dame!!!
Right now we are 39-35 on the season, 3-3 in Brinks truck bets (5 times your normal betting unit and up 4 units on the season. West Virginia and BYU gave us the Thursday night screw job special. Heading into this weekend we have 8 more picks for you and we are going to reveal these in true celebrity fashion:
The Britney Spears Train Wreck Games – I am hoping you can figure out the reason for our picks in the following two games based on the two pictures below:
Lets get a close up on that:
Yup that is Brit up close and personal and if you look above her beaver you can see her C-section scar….YUMMY!!!!! She even grosses Paris Hilton out. Now that says a lot!! Our recommendation to Paris is to have her car seats thoroughly scrubbed. The following two picks are in true train wreck fashion, just like our pal Britney; we have puss shots, C-section scars, drugs, alcohol, Federline….Michael Jackson and OJ get to keep their kids but Brit does not. What the heck did she do to lose child privileges. She defines Train Wreck!!! Now for the games:
Train Wreck Game 1 = Texas A and M @ Missouri (-19) – We love Missouri this year, 7 and 1 against the spread (ATS) and they show a tendency to show no mercy and pour on the points. So why is this a train wreck game….it is all on Franchione, the A and M coach. He was selling insider team news to boosters for $1,200 subscripions and got caught and now he is a distraction to the university and his team. In addition, the Aggies are simply soft. Look at the Aggies road games this year…Lost at Miami 34-17, lost at Texas Tech 35-7, lost at Oklahoma 42-14. Somehow they did manage to beat Nebraska 36-14 on the road but we know Nebraska is the second worse team in the country to Notre Dame so we discount that one. Now we hear that Franchione is in buyout talks with the university and Jeff Tedford is rumoured to be in line to take over for him. There is just too much BS going on with A and M right now and we think they are going to get blown out. Just to kick them while they are down:
Texas A and M
Aggies are 7-19-1 ATS in their last 27 games as a road underdog.
Aggies are 1-4 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Aggies are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games on grass.
Aggies are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 road games vs. a team with a winning home record.
Aggies are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 conference games.
Aggies are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 road games.
Aggies are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games overall.
Aggies are 2-9 ATS in their last 11 games as a road underdog of 10.5 or greater.
Aggies are 1-5 ATS in their last 6 games as an underdog.
We can rattle of 10 ATS numbers for why Missouri beats their ass but we do not think it is necessary. Missouri leaves C-section scars all over the Aggies, wins and covers.
Train Wreck Game 2 = USC @ California (+4) – Our good friend Jeff Tedford has found a way back into our hearts, blog and picks. As you read above, Tedford is rumoured to be inline for the Texas A and M job and that is just what we wanted to hear…Distraction city for the Cal Bears this week. Cal is a mess and has not covered in 4 games; losing outright in three of them. They barely beat Washington State at home last week. We despise Jeff Tedford and believe he has lost control of this team. He has perhaps the most weapons on offense of any school in the country and he is not using them. How is it that D. Jackson does not even lead the Bears in receptions? Way to promote your Heisman candidate coach! In addition, USC owns Nate Longshore and causes fits for Tedford’s offense. With the E-Freak coming off a 3.5 sack game against Oregon State and the USC defense racking up 9 sacks; we think Longshore will be running for his life and making very bad decisions. Some ATS numbers for you:
Road team is 8-3 ATS in their last 11 meetings.
Trojans are 6-0 ATS in their last 6 games as a road favorite of 3.5-10.0.
Trojans are 5-0 ATS in their last 5 games as a favorite of 3.5-10.0.
Trojans are 4-1 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Trojans are 21-6 ATS in their last 27 games in November.
Golden Bears are 2-5 ATS in their last 7 games as a home underdog.
Golden Bears are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games as an underdog.
Golden Bears are 2-8 ATS in their last 10 games following a ATS loss.
Golden Bears are 0-4 ATS in their last 4 games in November.
Golden Bears are 0-4 ATS in their last 4 conference games.
Golden Bears are 0-4 ATS in their last 4 games overall.
USC is back on the scene, easy win and cover for the Trojans!!!
Lauren Conrad vs. Heidi Montag Smack Down Games – These two crazy bitches hate each other and love having their catty little fights on The Hills MTV show.
Basically these two feud constantly and bash each other on the show and in the media so what better games to compare them to than to two SEC battles.
Game 3 = Arkansas @ Tennessee (pick em) = We love this matchup and as a real surprise, Arkansas is a clean sweep from a stats view point. Tennessee does not have a great run defense and The Razorbacks dynamic duo is coming off a game where they ran for 487 yards combined. In addition, the Razorbacks are 6-1 ATS in their last 7 meetings. One thing to think about is that Tennessee is undefeated at home this season and this is a pick em game. We think there is no time like the present for a Vols loss. Here are some ATS numbers for you:
Razorbacks are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 road games vs. a team with a winning home record.
Razorbacks are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 games overall.
Razorbacks are 6-2 ATS in their last 8 games in November.
Razorbacks are 8-3 ATS in their last 11 road games.
Volunteers are 3-10 ATS in their last 13 games in November.
Take Arkansas for the win in this game!!! This is also the Mrs. Frash Flash pick of the week. She is 1-1 on the season and she likes Arkansas to win this week because crazy girls go to Tennessee. We do not know what that means but that is her logic.
Game 4 = Auburn @ Georgia (+2) – We love seeing Auburn as the road dog in an SEC game. The Tigers are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 meetings in Georgia and the Road team is 8-3 ATS in their last 11 meetings. Auburn has a nasty defense and will be able to take advantage of Georgia’s youth on the offensive line and in the backfield. We love Auburn’s ATS numbers this week and they come across as one of the strongest opportunities we have had in awhile:
Tigers are 5-0 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Tigers are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games as an underdog of 0.5-3.0.
Tigers are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games following a straight up win.
Tigers are 6-0 ATS in their last 6 games as a road underdog.
Tigers are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 road games vs. a team with a winning home record.
Tigers are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games after allowing less than 20 points in their previous game.
Tigers are 7-0 ATS in their last 7 games as an underdog.
Tigers are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 road games.
Tigers are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games on grass.
Tigers are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games overall.
Tigers are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 conference games.
Bulldogs are 5-11 ATS in their last 16 games following a ATS loss.
Bulldogs are 4-10-1 ATS in their last 15 games as a home favorite.
Bulldogs are 3-8 ATS in their last 11 games after scoring more than 40 points in their previous game.
Bulldogs are 2-6-1 ATS in their last 9 home games vs. a team with a winning road record.
Bulldogs are 2-9-1 ATS in their last 12 games as a favorite.
Bulldogs are 0-6-1 ATS in their last 7 games after accumulating more than 200 yards rushing in their previous game.
Georgia is just not that impressive to us and we love whenever you can give points to Auburn on the road. Take Auburn for the cover and do not be surprised if they win.
Rosie O’Donnell Fat Slobby Pig Game – Rosie O’Donnell is a big fat nasty pig of a woman who is opinionated and loud and really does not have anything meaningful to say. Sound familiar to you, still guessing, thinking….Notre Dame Fans are loud, obnoxious, think they have a good coach, top recruiting classes, are always the team to beat, etc….Excuses, excuses, excuses!!!
Game 5 = Air Force @ Notre Dame (+3.5) – Do we really need to talk about this game? Just bet against Notre Dame and its 119th rated offense every single week. We wanted to point out that we are not the only people bashing Notre dame and Charlie Weis…check out a recent Jason Whitlock article: Weis’ NFL experience not helping him now. Also we saw this news and had to let out a chuckle, “Freshman Jimmy Clausen will start at quarterback for the Irish against Air Force on Saturday, Notre Dame announced Wednesday. Irish coach Charlie Weis did not make himself available for comment but a team spokesman said Weis would address the choice Thursday evening.” We love betting against Claussen’s noodle arm and terrible decision making ability. Some ATS numbers, not like you needed them:
Road team is 5-0 ATS in their last 5 meetings.
Falcons are 5-0 ATS in their last 5 games on grass.
Falcons are 5-0 ATS in their last 5 games overall.
Falcons are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 games following a ATS win.
Falcons are 4-1 ATS vs. a team with a losing record.
Fighting Irish are 6-15 ATS in their last 21 non-conference games.
Fighting Irish are 2-5 ATS in their last 7 games in November.
Fighting Irish are 3-8 ATS in their last 11 games as a home underdog.
Fighting Irish are 3-8 ATS in their last 11 games as an underdog.
Fighting Irish are 3-8 ATS in their last 11 games overall.
Fighting Irish are 2-6 ATS in their last 8 games on grass.
Fighting Irish are 4-14 ATS in their last 18 home games vs. a team with a winning road record.
Fighting Irish are 2-8 ATS in their last 10 home games.
Fighting Irish are 1-5 ATS in their last 6 games following a ATS loss.
Fighting Irish are 0-4 ATS in their last 4 games as a home underdog of 0.5-3.0.
Notre Dame can not beat Navy as a favorite and now they are home underdogs to Airforce. What has this world come to? Notre Dame is defeated and Charlie is a technician, not a motivator. The Notre Dame program is in trouble!!! Take Air Force to win and cover with ease!
The Broncos Cheerleaders Game – We were not witty enough to come up with a real game comparison for the following so we decided to show a picture of the hottest Boise State cheerleader. Enjoy!
Game 6 = Boise State @ Utah State (+24.5) – This is not going to be a competitive game and the decision simply comes down to are you comfortable enough in Boise State’s ability to crush an opponent on the road by more than 24 points. Let us try to convince you! Boise State is a clean sweep team this week. They run for more than 85 yards more than Utah St., are far more efficient in converting third downs (51.4% versus 31.0%, give up 80 yards rushing less on defense per game and stop offenses from converting third downs (31.9% versus 46.7%). Can you smell the burning flesh? The Broncos are going to run all over these guys. Also, keep it in the back of your mind that Boise State plays with a lot of pride and is on a roll since losing to Washington. Boise State knows they need to remain undefeated heading into their end of season matchup at Hawaii for the title. Boise State knows what is at stake and will continue their destruction of conference foes. Some ATS numbers:
Broncos are 4-0 ATS in their last 4 meetings in Utah State.
Broncos are 6-0-1 ATS in their last 7 meetings.
Favorite is 4-1-1 ATS in their last 6 meetings.
Aggies are 4-10-1 ATS in their last 15 games in November.
Aggies are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games as a home underdog of 10.5 or greater.
Aggies are 1-4 ATS in their last 5 games as a home underdog.
Aggies are 1-5 ATS in their last 6 home games.
Boise State wins in a blow out and covers easily. Do not be afraid of the points!!!
The Keira Knightley Tribute to Pirates Game – You probably can not figure out what we mean by this game and neither can we. This was the toughest game to categorize because zero people are going to watch it cause nobody cares but degenerate gamblers like us. Enjoy the picture and we will get into the game below.
Game 7 = East Carolina @ Marshall (+7) – This game stacks up as another clean sweep game. East Carolina likes to run (173 YPG) and Marshall can not stop the run (211.4 YPG). Do you need more? How about the turnover ratio…East Carolina plus 14 and Marshall minus 12. We were salivating that this line was under 10 points and do not think this game will be competitive at all. The ATS numbers:
Pirates are 10-1 ATS vs. a team with a losing record.
Pirates are 6-1 ATS in their last 7 games in November.
Pirates are 5-1 ATS in their last 6 games overall.
Pirates are 4-1 ATS in their last 5 road games.
Pirates are 6-2 ATS in their last 8 games as a favorite of 3.5-10.0.
Pirates are 19-7 ATS in their last 26 conference games.
Pirates are 7-3 ATS in their last 10 games as a favorite.
Pirates are 11-5 ATS in their last 16 games following a ATS win.
Thundering Herd are 3-8 ATS in their last 11 games in November.
Thundering Herd are 2-6 ATS vs. a team with a winning record.
Thundering Herd are 3-11-1 ATS in their last 15 games as an underdog.
Thundering Herd are 1-4-1 ATS in their last 6 games after scoring less than 20 points in their previous game.
Thundering Herd are 1-5-1 ATS in their last 7 games after allowing more than 200 yards rushing in their previous game.
Thundering Herd are 1-6 ATS in their last 7 games as an underdog of 3.5-10.0.
East Carolina wins and covers easily!!!
The Cindy Crawford is Still Hot Game – Yep. Cindy Crawford was born in 1966, meaning she is over 40 and still damn hot. She just keeps on ticking and has been a model since she was 16. It does not matter what decade she works in, if she has kids, Cindy still rises to the top and is hot. Get where we are going with this one.
Game 8 = Kansas @ Oklahoma State (+6) – Kansas remains the only unbeaten team in Div-1 against the spread sitting at 8-0 on the season. They also destroyed Nebraska last week. They also have Mangino. People thought the points last week were too high and Kansas blasted right through it. Well this week they face an Oklahoma State team on the road, a team that led Texas 35-17 in the 4th quarter last week and choked. We know a lot of people that are picking Oklahoma for the straight upset and we are not going to get sucked in. Both teams run and are efficient on offense but Kansas has a much better defense and causes a lot more turnovers. One ATS number has us worried and that is the fact that the Jayhawks are 0-6 ATS in their last 6 meetings. Something to think about, yes, but something to change bets on, NO!!! The favorite is 4-1 ATS in their last 5 meetings and Kansas looks nasty ATS-wise:
Jayhawks are 5-0 ATS in their last 5 conference games.
Jayhawks are 7-0 ATS in their last 7 games after allowing less than 100 yards rushing in their previous game.
Jayhawks are 5-0 ATS in their last 5 games after scoring more than 40 points in their previous game.
Jayhawks are 6-0 ATS in their last 6 games following a ATS win.
Cowboys are 2-5 ATS in their last 7 games in November.
Cowboys are 7-19 ATS in their last 26 games as an underdog of 3.5-10.0.
Cowboys are 4-11 ATS in their last 15 games as a home underdog of 3.5-10.0.
We think Kansas is hot and will remain hot. Take the Jayhawks for the win and cover!!!!
And there you have it. Hot chicks and hot picks!!! Hope you enjoyed the blog. Please feel free to leave comments or to ask us to pick additional games for you. We are here to be used as a service and a tool to make YOU money!!! Also, sign up for our RSS feeds so you can get our posts in real time and before the lines move on you. If you signed up to our blog you probably would have received Central Michigan at minus 2.5 as a winner and not at minus 3 as a push.
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